On the night on January 16th, Casey and I were wide awake. There was no way we could sleep in anticipation of Will's arrival, so we chatted about the past year and how excited we were to hold a baby in our arms. It still didn't feel real. The 16th marked the eve to our much wanted new chapter.
Over the past 3 years of trying, I had been pregnant for 73 weeks and still without a child. Pregnancy felt so old to me. It also felt like a sense of identity. When discussing certain concerts or trips Casey and I would use each pregnancy as a marker. "Remember we saw Pearl Jam right when we found out we were pregnant the first time?" "No, we saw Dave Matthews and Tim Reynolds in between Robyn and Will". Selfishly, I'm excited to have my body back and to not keep committing to a stressful 9 month journey. The 9 month journey will continue in a couple years with our next child, but I'm looking forward to a break.
Finally, it was a reasonable hour where Casey and I could hop into the car and head to the hospital. We still arrived 20 minutes early. Every sign we passed or song we listened to I said, "oh my gosh...that's the last time we will pass ( insert noun) without Will!" "This is the last time we leave the car without Will". Sometimes when I'm nervous it helps to be annoying to my husband. I know, best wife ever. However, it really was the last time the world would exist as just Cassie and Casey.
The c-section prep was pretty straight forward. Other than me peeing every 30 seconds because I was nervous, it was super low key. Once I entered the surgical room I was immediately calmed by a "sign from the universe" (Amy Schumer has a pretty awesome sketch about women in their late 20's/early 30's thinking everything was a "sign from the universe". Well, I fit that demographic...so yea..."sign from the universe") The music playing in the operating room was Dave Matthews Band! When Casey entered the room I excitedly told him how our doctor and anesthesiologist have both been to multiple concerts. I'm pretty sure he just thought it was the pain meds talking. Within 10 minutes of the surgery, I heard the most beautiful sound in the world. Will started to cry! First, I couldn't believe it happened so fast and second, this was the most surreal moment I have ever felt. Unfortunately Will had a lot of fluid in his lungs so I couldn't do "skin to skin" or hold him for 90 minutes. Casey took pictures of him and showed me on his iPhone. We were so in love with this little man.
More to follow. Milk is everywhere at the moment :-D